Conservative rock music has got to be up there in the all time chart of classic oxymorons. They don't get it, they don't understand it, but they keep desperately trying to cool hunt some kind of association between rock and pop music and conservative politics. But here come the British conservatives like Iain Dale getting excited at the prospect of Danny Finkelstein's search for "centre right" rock stars. (Dale shows this one is right over his head by proposing the theme music from Band of Brothers!)
Of course we've been here before. In a seeming act of political desperation John J. Miller in the National Inquirer has attempted to list “the 50 greatest conservative rock songs”. Now the first reaction is to say are there really 50 conservative rock songs, full stop, let alone any that would qualify for the classification of “great”. The gross error Miller made was in his definitions which include songs which contain the “conservative idea or sentiment, such as skepticism of government”. US conservatives distrust of government usually boils down to disliking any interference in the affairs of the rich and powerful to get on and do what they like, exploit the poor, pollute the environment.
Whereas the strand of left wing governmental distrust which runs through much rock music is based on the view that the rich and powerful hold a corrupting grip on the state. In many rock songs it is a libertarian socialist or anarchist sentiment which drives distrust of “the man”. Conservatives, listen carefully, you are the establishment! All great rock music has the default position of you as the bad guys, ready to send the police round to smash up the band's equipment for violating and enraging "decent" citizens.
For crying out loud how can anyone who knows anything about the history of popular music put - as Miller
does - the Sex Pistols and the Clash in a list of “conservative” rock music! Joe Strummer must be turning in his grave! That’ll be the same Clash who released the triple disc Sandinista to express support for the Nicaraguan socialist liberation movement in their conflict with…the US. The same Clash who name check Marx in the Magnificent Seven, the same band led by Joe Strummer who throughout his career expressed sympathy for the working class, hostility to racism and showed solidarity with liberation movements across the globes.
As for the Sex Pistols we look forward to the sentiments of “I am an antichrist…. I am an anarchist” being incorporated into future Republican or Conservative policy.
It's all looks like an act of desperation - scanning single lines in songs which might be interpreted as being in some way “conservative” whilst ignoring the wider body of work from that artist. How else can we explain Miller's inclusion of U2, who have worked hard for Greenpeace and on global poverty issues. And the Beatles! Sure the song Revolution expresses contempt for what we might call today trendy radicals. But we are talking about John Lennon who wrote imagine and working class hero. As Alex Petridis puts it:
"Any songwriter who doesn't actively cheerlead for Stalinism is held to be a neo-con, anyone who mentions Arabs is automatically assumed to want to bomb them off the face of the earth. The hitherto-unnoticed rightwing sympathies of the Beatles' Revolution are uncovered by the simple expedient of misquoting the lyrics. It seems a shame that he stopped at 50, thus depriving readers of the opportunity to learn how Morrissey's Margaret on the Guillotine is actually a demand for the reintroduction of the death penalty, the Dead Kennedys' Kill the Poor backs the Bush administration's policy on Hurricane Katrina and how close analysis of Billy Bragg's version of The Internationale reveals it to be a hearty endorsement of the current US regime."
The SNP supporting socialist brothers - The Proclaimers - must also have been equally delighted to be included!
Not content with his first ludicrous attempt to create a list of conservative rock songs. Miller returned with "50 more conservative rock songs".
This time he included The Smiths (Morrissey wrote of putting Thatcher to the guillotine), Elvis Costello (who wrote of tramping the dirt down on Thatcher’s grave), and the Dead Kennedys!
The Dead Kennedys right wing. Make you own minds Up;
"Kill The Poor"
Efficiency and progress is ours once more
Now that we have the Neutron bomb
It's nice and quick and clean and gets things done
Away with excess enemy
But no less value to property
No sense in war but perfect sense at home:
The sun beams down on a brand new day
No more welfare tax to pay
Unsightly slums gone up in flashing light
Jobless millions whisked away
At last we have more room to play
All systems go to kill the poor tonight"
Well, if nothing else the chap is good for a laugh trying to convince us that black is actually white. What next? 50 great conservative writers including George Orwell, Simone De Beauvoir, Satre and George Bernard Shaw?
We wish Finkelstein good luck in his venture, yes he'll sure need it, looking forward to similar hope he doesn't make the same embarrassing errors as Miller.
Poor old conservatives types, listen, you need to face up to the truth, you will never be cool or hip, so just stop trying!
It is called "grasping at straws".
Posted by: Larry Gambone | March 21, 2007 at 07:00 PM